A letter to a friend

Dear friend,

I went to your blog and read your tagboard. It saddens me to find that you are engulfed with so much anger, sadness, hatred and accusations. If I may, may I ask why have you turn out to be like this? You are not like the friend I knew during our younger years. A friend who is full of laughter, joy and love.

Why all the accusations? First and foremost, I would like to recall back our aging memory. One unfortunate night, I, along with my other friends, received an unfavorable text message from you. I shall not elaborate the message but it is something like this, “…I won’t be using this number anymore…please delete it now…”. A friend of ours replied to that message asking what is the new number to contact you, but my dear friend, you choose to ignore it.

As you already know, a few days back, we went out for dinner. One of our friends tagged you asking you to come along. But my dear friend, you choose to ignore it yet again.

Tagging you on your blog’s tagboard is the only means of communication we have because not all of us have you residential number. And even if we do, that is not the definite way of getting in contact with you isn’t it? I mean, you’re not always home 24/7 right?

You mentioned about you being busy. My dear friend, everyone of us is busy. The only not busy people are those buried 7 feet down the ground. We too are working, we too are busy with work, we too have families, we too have boyfriend and we too are busy with Hari Raya preparations my dear. You are not the only one who is choked up with busy itineraries. Despite our work place being much further then yours and our hectic schedule, we made time to contact each other and made do with the little time we have to spare.

It doesn’t have to be hanging out till late nights, it can just be a simple hello via text messaging. From what I see, we have been trying our very best to try to get you involve in our activities, but you made it impossibly hard for us to get through you. Before you point fingers of accusations to us again, let me just say that I do not think my statements above are bias. It is a fact. We did tried our best to keep you updated to the extend of calling your work place. Now you tell me, is that fair for us? We do not mind all the hassle you brought upon us, because to us, you are our friend, never have it came across our mind to cut the ties with you. It saddens us to receive such shocking text message from you that night.

You mentioned that you have personal problems that you do not wish to share with us. Instead of just disappearing without any warning, the least you can do is to just tell us that you have a personal problem that you really cannot reveal and we’d understand and respect your decision. That way is more respectful rather than the sudden disappearing act.

If you think we are grinning from ear to ear, happy that you are ‘suffering’ alone, you better think again. Do you even realize that you hurt us? Yes, hurt, like a stab through our hearts. If you think we are ganging up to ‘victimize’ you, dear friend, you better think again. Fact is, we are cracking our brains on ways to help you.

From my view, I think you have insecurities issues. I am sorry to bring this up, but if your other half really love you for who you really are, then he should trust you fully. By not letting you be friend with certain people, do not allow you to put on make up… is this what you call love? Shouldn’t you accept each other for who you really are? Pardon my frankness but am I wrong to say all these? I, together with our other friends wish one day, you can emerge to your old true self rather than be buried even further in the rubble of control-mania.

We know you love him, and vice-versa, and according to you, you are happy. You being happy is what we really want. We also want you to regain back you self confidence that we know you possessed. As you know, we have never judged you. We care for you for who you really are.

So please be more grateful and stop all these bullshits of “from this day, dun bother contacting me or even care about me anymore”, because we really care and we still care. If we do not care, we would not have planned to seat and talked to you that day when you were having some issues. We would not have spared our precious time to accompany you for your nightly jogs. If you think we are heartless creatures, I and the others would be more than happy to prove to you that you are terribly wrong.

Yours truly,
Huda